Terrence and Tiffany Low met during their last semester at Howard University. Even though they were both from Chicago and had mutual friends, the two of them never crossed paths until right before graduation.
“I was not an easy person to date when we first started off,” Tiffany admits. “I made Terrence really work for my attention and time. His persistence never wavered.” Eventually, she became convinced that he was the one by his sweet gestures and the fact that he always kept his word. In November 2017, he sealed the deal by proposing in a pretty grand and artistic way. “So many friends and family flew in from all around the country and he organized it all by himself,” Mrs. Low says. “I was filled with so much emotion, and cried happy tears all night.”
Their wedding, held at an opera theater in Chicago, was just as grand. The color scheme of black and gold married perfectly with the classic red carpets and gold fixtures of the venue. Thanks to La Toya Keys of Elle Kay Events, the Lows’ wedding day went off without a hitch. Tiffany says, “I am happy that I hired a planner and would absolutely recommend having one for all brides.”
As a wedding coordinator, it is literally my job to make people’s lives (and wedding days) easier. using all my wedding coordinator tricks. Weddings can be overwhelming, hectic, and there are almost always some bumps along the way. I’ve been to so many weddings now that I’ve seen (and fixed) a lot of the common mistakes that pop up on wedding days. I’ve put out fires (both literal and figurative), gone on beer runs, and altered dresses on site.
Since I’ve done this wedding thing so many times, a lot of the hitches in the day are predictable to me. But chances are you’re planning a wedding for the first time — so, the stuff that’s obvious to me, won’t be obvious to you until it’s happening. So, whether you hire a coordinator to put out fires for you, convince a friend to be your stage manager, or you’re running the show yourself, here are some of the best tips and tricks I’ve learned from years of going to weddings! (And no, I’m not just talking about a bag with extra bobby pins and tissues — though that’s a good thing to have too!)
1.HAIR AND MAKEUP ALWAYS TAKE LONGER THAN EXPECTED:
Are you getting your hair and makeup done professionally? This applies! Are you DIYing your hair and makeup or getting help from a friend or family member? This still applies! There is just something about hair and makeup on a wedding day that practically never fails to take longer than we expect (especially if it’s more than just you getting ready). So instead of planning to be ready at exactly the time your photos will start, aim for twenty to thirty minutes before that.
2.TELL A LITTLE WHITE LIE… OR A FEW:
I always recommend telling your family, wedding party, and maybe even your partner a few little lies during wedding weekend. Just let them all know that they should be at the rehearsal at 4:45 p.m. instead of 5:00 p.m. and at family photos at 3:20 p.m. instead of 3:30 p.m. This is one of the best time-saving tricks to make sure that people are where they need to be when they need to be there. And since late happens, a white lie or two won’t hurt them (and will ensure some buffer time for the latebirds).
3.DON’T STARVE… ANYONE:
Wedding days can feel really hectic and crazy, and one of the things that almost always gets left to the wayside is eating. That goes for the couple, the wedding party, the vendors… everyone but the guests. Have a plan in place ahead of time so that the whole wedding party gets fed while they’re getting ready — this will keep a lot of people from becoming hangry!
Also, your vendors need to eat. They love you, and they’re there for you. But without food they tend to forget how much they love you, if you get my drift. And while at some smaller weddings it can be nice to sit with the guests, contrary to popular belief, vendors almost always prefer to sneak away to a quiet spot to shovel food into our mouths and recharge.
Please, please, please make sure there is enough food and enough time for everyone (yourself included) to eat!
These are great. Honestly. Many times, people get caught up in the grand spectacle of the ceremony or the big moments of the reception and forget to take the little moments into account. But those little moments are where the magic is (which sounds super cliche, but things are often cliche for a reason).
You can, however, prepare in advance — especially if your ceremony or reception is outdoors. Ask your rental company to put an extra tent on reserve, says Calder Clark of Calder Clark design firm in Charleston, South Carolina. (They may charge you a small percentage of the total cost, but it buys you peace of mind.) You can also reserve stand-up fans if you’re worried about a heat wave. After that? Stop looking at the hourly forecast every 45 seconds.
2. Hire a day-of coordinator.
“So many couples think they can do all of the planning on their own, and that’s completely fine — up until the day of the wedding,” says Brooke Keegan of Brooke Keegan Weddings & Events in Newport Beach, California. “If you can hire someone to handle the details on the actual day, it alleviates so much stress. You should be a guest at your wedding, not the staff.” Even if a soup-to-nuts planner isn’t in your budget, many offer more affordable, day-of services.
3. Keep your schedule clear.
It’s tempting to plan a big brunch or line up manicures, pedicures, hair, and a bikini wax on the morning of the wedding, but try not to do too much. (Stick to the absolute necessities — hair and makeup.) “Your wedding day will fly by faster than you could ever imagine. If you have too many activities, you won’t have space to take in the real once-in-a-lifetime moments,” says Maria Baer, co-owner of Ritzy Bee Events in Washington, D.C.
4. Don’t “check in” on your venue beforehand.
It’s tempting on the day of to peek in (or drive by) the reception site while everyone is setting up. Don’t do that. “Brides want to see all of their planning and vision come to fruition, of course. But my advice is to wait for the big reveal, when the candlelight, the beautiful linens, the great band can really tell the story,” says Audrey Hurst of Audrey Hurst Weddings in Memphis, Tennessee. Not only is the payoff not as sweet if you’re checking on lighting and flowers all day; you’ll just make yourself crazy seeing a half-finished hall.
5. Make sure someone knows how to bustle your dress.
Don’t rely on a safety pin and a prayer. Have a friend or relative go with you to a fitting to learn how to bustle the train, if you have one, and make sure that person practices and sticks around post-ceremony to button you into shape.
A wedding day can seem inherently stressful. Buuuut there are ways to reduce the levels of stress. From setting times for you two to escape the hustle and bustle of the reception to have some quiet time together to having back-up plans for any potential catastrophe, stress can be mitigated. Take it from the brides here!
You’ve read all the bridal books there are to read, signed up for every wedding tip of the day, and downloaded an embarrassing amount of planning apps. But you can always use more big-day advice before you walk down the aisle — right? We asked nine real brides who’ve already been there, done that to shell out their best advice for your wedding. So from one bride to another, listen up.
Breathe, enjoy the planning process and ultimately, enjoy your day and being with all your loved ones. If something goes wrong, you’re surrounded by people who are willing to help and support you.
Take Pictures Before You Say, “I Do”
“You’ll have more time to spend with your guests at the reception if you take your photos first. Even if you want to stick to not seeing your groom before you walk down the aisle, you can still get all of the other photos out of the way.” — Jasmine, 24
Get Your Food to Go
“Ask your caterer to pack away food for you (the cocktail hour food, the main course, the cake … everything) because likely you’ll have absolutely no time to eat any of it. And trust me: You’ll be starving when you get back to the hotel at the end of the night.” — Rebecca, 26
Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
“Breathe, enjoy the planning process and ultimately, enjoy your day and being with all your loved ones. If something goes wrong, you’re surrounded by people who are willing to help and support you. In the end, no one is going to remember how much effort you put into those paper flowers that now have crinkled edges anyway. Trust me, I made hundreds!” — Ashley, 23
Be a Woman with a Plan
“Before the wedding, designate someone to take home all your gifts and mementos (like your guest book and card box) after the reception and to close out any final vendor payments. If you’re changing out of your gown before going to the hotel, you’ll need someone to take it home too. You can delegate these responsibilities to a bridesmaid, family member, or day-of-planner.” — Janice, 27
Tell Your Wedding Party Exactly What to Do
“Create a very detailed itinerary of the wedding weekend for your wedding party and anyone else involved. It will help everyone understand where they need to be when and what is expected of them.” — Kelley, 29
Remember to Soak in the Moment
“Really look around at everyone in attendance and think about how much they mean to you. It will probably be the only time all those people are in the same room. Take in how much you love your significant other and how amazing you feel at that very moment. Married life has its challenges, and you’ll need to draw on that feeling from time to time. Whether you’re worried about buying a home or starting a family, that feeling can get you through everything!” — Brittany, 28
Got the night before wedding jitters? We don’t blame you. Night before (and day before) wedding nervousness is par for the course. Channel all that energy into completing these 21 things to do the night before your wedding and you’ll give yourself peace of mind and a good foundation for the big day itself.
Things to Do the Night Before Your Wedding
1. Eat a healthy meal.
Though the greasy pizza and the bag of cool ranch Doritos might be screaming your name, stick to the fresh fruit and the whole grains. They won’t have you waking up with a food hangover like a Big Mac and a side of fries will on your wedding day.
2. Pack a bag or clutch of personal items.
Put together your reception clutch and your post-reception bag and hand it off to your wedding point person, who can help make sure it’s waiting for you in the bridal suite or in your hotel room.
EMILY ROBERTS/BRIDES
3. Drink a lot of water.
Keep a cold glass of water nearby and make sure you spend some quality time with it. This will help you avoid any dehydration that stress and running around can often cause.
Say goodbye to checking Facebook and answering frantic text messages. Turn your chunky device on silent or hand it over to your maid of honor.
6. Put any boxes, suitcases, or bags you need to bring to the ceremony or reception in the car.
Pack the car with all the items you’ll need for your wedding day so that you can wake up in the morning and not have to worry about doing any heavy lifting before getting out of the door.
7. Make sure you have cash on hand.
Have a couple of 20 dollar bills nearby in case you need to tip any of your vendors or in case of any last-minute emergencies.
8. Double-check payment for vendors.
Have them sorted out digitally — whether that means you’ve scheduled payments via PayPal or Venmo or gather checks and cash and put them in clearly marked envelopes and hand them off to your point person for the wedding day (whether that’s your wedding planner, professional bridesmaid, or trusty uncle).
I know it’s virtually impossible to do much of anything the night before your wedding, but for real: if one were to try and do even half of these things, wedding day stress would be exponentially lowered. Even just trying to get a good nights sleep can seem impossible, but trust your humble DJ, it’s important.
